Sunday 18 February 2007

What is Time to Us?

My husband's "art"

The shower is my thinking spot. If it weren't so very environmentally evil, I could stand in the shower all day, just thinking. I have this image of emerging, my head all swollen with thoughts and the rest of me shrunk like a prune. This morning, while contemplating the "Things I'd Like to Get Done Today" list, I remembered a recent visit to my parents, where I had use of a car. We are carless here, and I like it that way, but goodness, I got a lot of stuff done in those couple of days.

Oh, all the things I could get done....Then I thought - would I stop? Would I use the extra time to do nothing, to relax, to craft? Of course not. I'd just keep doing stuff, crossing things off my list. The thing is, there is no end to The List, so I think I'll just stick to long walks to the the corner grocery store, a subway ride to the bookstore, and bus rides to the park. I'm not made for zipping...
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Reflecting on the above, it sounds too easy, too glib. The time thing has always been a struggle for me, a struggle to slow down, to not get caught up with the flow. The "slow life movement" vibe is something to which I aspire, not something that I've achieved. And part of it, I think, is valuing the process rather than the achievement. The idea of Achievement is getting much less glossy as time goes on, less desirable, even though it's something that concerned me very much when I was younger. Maybe by letting it go I'm able to actually do things and enjoy them now...